How I spent my birthday this year

I woke up at 11:21 a.m. , got out of bed at 12:30 p.m. Purchased a greasy (=yummy) cheese burger with greasier fries and a coke from the Carl's Junior drive through for breakfast and scarfed it down at home on the couch. Watched the Seahawks game at 1:00-4:30 (they won, woohoo!). Felt a desire to be close to nature, so decided to go to the beach. Walked around Newport Beach and saw some people in heavy sweaters and some in bathing suits (how weird is that?). Decided to go on the pier to get a good view of the ocean, but was faced with fishermen pulling out dying fish from the ocean that were gasping for dear life! Was disgusted. Sat on the curb by the beach and decided to watch the sunset. The smog was so heavy that the sun set before it hit the horizon line (had never seen THAT before!?). Decided that I want crabs for dinner. Couldn't find parking at the restaurant that said "Crabs" on the windows, so kept on driving. Decided to go find a new joint to eat on PCH, missed the exit so kept on driving. Meanwhile, there is smoke in the air due to a fire some where. As we kept driving toward home, we notice that the smoke is getting heavier and heavier! Poor souls whoever has to be around that fire. Wait, it looks like we are driving toward the smokey area! hhmm, interesting... as we get closer it looks more and more like the heavy smoke is coming from exactly where we are going to, home! So the last 5 minutes to get to our house we hit every red light which gives us more time to think about all the things in our home and how we could live with out them. We finally arrive and our house is safe. However, there is fire across the street burning the hills, big heavy fast spreading flames! After we panic, take pictures, talk to a few people, we come home and eat Trader Joe's Sushi while watching our neighborhood on the news. I get an urge to clean the floors. Now I'm sweeping and mopping the floors in the house while there is fire burning outside. I continue with washing the dishes, watering the plants, etc. You would think that I was getting the house ready for the fire. Then I watch my favorite Sunday night show (Desperate Housewives), followed by our Tivoed Star Trek The Next Generation (Jean Luke was injured which took him back in time). I end the day by listening to the reporter on TV say that the residents of Southern California will remember October 21st as a sad day, I get offended. I go to bed with smoke in the air finding their way into my lungs, thinking about how I should clean the black ash off of my beige patio furniture.
Happy Happy Birthday to Meeeeee!